In the lobby, Mom reminded me to schedule massages for the mornings of the days I’d be singing. I was glad she reminded me – I was so tired at that point, nothing in my brain was working properly.
I went down to the gym, and Hayley looked through the schedule for me. Full body massage wasn’t available all days, but other things were – so Wednesday Thursday Friday I have an Indian Head Massage, Relaxology, and a Full Body Massage. Two of those I have never tried, and boy am I excited! I think just getting to stay in a hotel with nifty stuff like that is a huge perk. Gurgle. I can’t wait. I’m not completely sure I’ll have enough time Thursday, but I’m hoping against hope! We’ll see what traffic is like Wednesday. It will be fine. It will be absolutely fine.
I’ve been catching up on LiveJournal, getting through my email. I spoke with David Williams on the phone – what a refreshing conversation! It was so nice to talk with him. It seems like it’s been so long, but of course, I’m a kabillion miles away. We caught up and touched base and all of those good things.
Despite the internet problems, I really am doing very well. I have Monday and Tuesday to rest up for Wednesday, at which point I will commence a possible three day sprint. (My god, if it ends up being a three day sprint, I really will have won the lottery!) Competing once a day for many days in a row is exhausting, and I am surprised every single time because I forget how a simple thing can have such an overwhelming physical effect. At home, rehearsing with a pianist, singing two songs is an experience, it takes energy – but it’s not exhausting, not by a long shot. At competition, everything is heightened, somehow. Maybe I just haven’t done it frequently enough to get used to it?
I want someone to talk to and I’m going to try to do that at midnight, since my brain still seems to be wide awake (even if the rest of me is shrieking for respite). I need a melatonin before bed, but I’ll get that at midnight when I go upstairs… it will be fine. (I hope.) Everything will be okay. Seriously.
That reminds me of what I was thinking in the shower this morning: Sometimes I do this strange self-comfort thing. When there are people around, chanting “Everything will be okay” over and over feels neurotic; when I’m alone in the shower with no one to hug, it’s almost tactile, warm and calming. Soothing. And the stress can get out of control so quickly, I have to have some kind of mechanism to deal with it, I suppose. I’m doing all right.
But that doesn’t let anyone off the hook. Hug me through email if you have to.
I’ll be home in ten days!!
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