This is difficult to write.
I started writing this Friday, and I’ve been working on it for days. This is really a dramatic change, if not a sudden one. It feels like an about-face, and it’s a little embarrassing. I’ve been thinking on it for a long time. I’m absolutely sure about it now.
Here’s what I started with: hometown negativity.
Over the last two or three years I have expressed a lot of unhappiness about Youngstown, where I lived for twelve years before moving to Austin. By then, Youngstown seemed representative of everything that was wrong with the world; dead economy, abandoned buildings, friends with unwanted pregnancies and DUIs, and people I cared about displaying careless attitudes about sex, safety and sanity. It felt like an environment feeding on itself. It felt like a bad place to be.
While I lived there, I was constantly avoiding social interaction. Everything happened at a bar, with alcohol, which is one thing, and cigarette smoke, which is another. None felt moderated: If we were getting drunk, we were getting very drunk. As a result, I spent a lot of time at home, by myself. On top of that, business felt wrong – the whole vibe felt wrong. If someone was doing good business in Youngstown, it definitely wasn’t me. Without a solution I was pretty sure I’d be closing up shop in favor of fast food job security, because who else would pay the rent on my cardboard box? Family finances were headed downhill. It was time to move to greener pastures while I still could. So I did.
The contrast between the incredibly unhealthy space I occupied in Youngstown and the overwhelmingly positive space I now occupy in Austin was unbelievable. It reinforced my certainty that Youngstown was a dangerous place to live – the environment, the influences, and many depressed, thoughtless people. To me, Youngstown was synonymous with trapped.
As you might expect, I wanted the people I loved out of that city. I wanted my friends and family to make their own decisions, but I wanted them to know where I stood: Not in Youngstown. I expressed this frequently.
As it turns out, I was kind of wrong.
Anything out there is only what we perceive it to be, but I didn’t have access to another perspective – at least, not that I knew. One fellow with whom I crossed paths had a plan, and seemed to have the funds to back it up, but he was just one possibility. There were others, I’m sure now, but I didn’t know them. They didn’t exist for me. I don’t think I realized what was going on until this year, when I started to really pay attention.
There was something happening in Youngstown back then, and it’s become much more powerful since. Something really interesting: the presence of revolutionaries!
My reality then was that Youngstown was a lower circle of hell, and irredeemable. It’s all rather shameful. Irredeemable?? Oy. Anyway, that’s the way I felt. I felt that way recently. But then I started learning about the people who are doing something positive in Youngstown, and I’ve changed my mind. I mean, really changed my mind!
This year I started hearing some crazy things out of the Mahoning Valley. Crazy, crazy things. Hearing that people were working hard, creating a new vision of the city they wanted to live in. What?? You mean you can make something what you want it to be?! Hell, I knew that! I sure never tried to apply it to a whole town. Business building is something I am really interested in, but city building? Sounded too big. Maybe impossible.
But then I started to hear all about how it was working.
I’m always a little astonished to find out what a dip I can be. Because why shouldn’t it work? Why on earth shouldn’t every single person in Youngstown be as powerful as I’ve always been so sure human beings can be? And why shouldn’t I expect them to manifest that, and make something wonderful? I don’t frickin’ know. But it’s awesome!
So, I’ve been reading Brooke Slanina’s Oakland Stage blog, and a ton of others; Brooke goes on and on about the possibility of growth in Youngstown, but there’s always this underlying thread that it’s dependent on what Youngstowners themselves are willing to do. The city needs the effort and focus of citizens to survive, and more than that, to become brilliant. All of my Youngstown negativity would still be real to me, if it weren’t for the time and attention of really real people working to make it better. Those people exist, I have discovered, and they have the intelligence and creativity and pure force of will to back their awesome ideas! Brooke hasn’t been kidding me all this time. She’s not fucking around, either.
Youngstown has been all over the national news. NPR covered the city’s plan for “shrinkage†– go ahead, laugh. It’s a great plan! John Edwards’ poverty tour, Youngstown 2010, the awesome activities of the Youngstown Business Incubator, not to mention stuff on C-Span, in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal – it’s time to pay attention! People are doing something now. They need help.
The idea of watching and not helping gives me horrible physical pain. They’re doing what I always wanted, when I was disconnected from everything, but never knew quite how to start. If I had known this was going on before the Austin Vortex drew me south, who knows what might have happened? But that was then, and this is now. And we can help now.
I have some big ideas about how I can affect Youngstown’s new energy from where I am, but most of them will take time. Some of you are still there, uncertain or struggling. You know something needs to be done, but you don’t know what to do. This is something you can do. At the absolute least, it’s time to start taking action to change the way we think about this city.
I used to tell people to leave before they no longer had a choice. But that’s not fair. It’s not fair to the city, or to the people who are working hard to make it better. And it sure as hell isn’t fair to those who might leave because they “have toâ€, when in staying they could make an incredible difference.
If you can stay, and make that difference… please do.
God, I understand needing to make one’s fortune elsewhere. If I had known all this would happen, I might still have gone south – many people are having a hard time making ends meet in the rust belt, and I am intimately familiar with that wavelength. You don’t have to convince me. If you’re that person – the way I was last year – then for heaven’s sake go and do what you need to do.
But some of you… some of you are doing okay. Some of you can make a real difference by staying, by getting in the loop with other Youngstown revolutionaries and making all of this work.
Whoever you are, whatever situation you’re in, I am trying to persuade you to believe in this. And now I’m going to persuade you to say something. Because it’s easy.
I’m going to tell you exactly what you can do to help.
No matter who you are or what’s going on, there are three things you can do to start helping right now, with almost no effort on your part! It doesn’t take much to get the word out, and here are some really easy ways to do it.
Three Easy Things You Can Do RIGHT NOW:
1. Ask your friends to read this post. It’s really important that people connected with Youngstown (and even elsewhere!) start to realize what’s happening there.
2. Write about the Youngstown effort in your blog. You can even link directly to this post, and send people here to find out about what’s going on.
3. Add this entry to Digg, del.icio.us, StumbleUpon – and anywhere else you can think of! The more people who hear about what’s happening in Youngstown, the better, so link traffic is a good thing.
I know that many of you want to do something positive, but you feel stuck. Oh god do I know that feeling. But there are so many people who want to help, and who can use your help. If you are feeling stuck, or afraid, it’s okay. IM me. Comment here, and we’ll help each other. The more of us that band together to create this thing, the faster it will happen and the more amazing it will be. Youngstowners are envisioning a healthy economy, a growing city, an urban paradise – but they need people to make it happen. If that sounds as awesome to you as it does to me, then I’ve done what I set to accomplish with this first post! (That makes me so happy.)
I’m doing something from 2200 miles away. What are you waiting for?!
Tagged as: Blog, city-building, hometown, meganculture, positivity, revolutionaries, worldhacking, youngstown